This is sort of part two of another thread like this which I did some time ago.
Don't anybody get offended, I'm just having a little fun at the expence of certain players/teams
It includes the usual subjects, Kobe, T-Mac, Iverson, Baker, Orlando, New Jersey, Vince and the Raptors and I've even taken a jab at MJ - so you all know what's comming...
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Competition between the most talented position in the NBA, the shooting guard position, was taken to another level this week. With the impending court case of Kobe Bryant, several other elite shooting guards have tried keep up with Kobe who is generally considered the most talented shooting guard in the game. Not wanting to be left behind in any way or shape, the often injured Allen Iverson came out and bragged of his own conquests, "Yo I did three ****** at the same time in L.A, did all of them, and did it while carrying multiple injuries... Kobe ain't got nothin' on me". Tracy McGrady answered Iverson's statement a day later by adding "I did 5 of 'em at once, and I can't see nothing out of my right eye!". Iverson is likely to be suspended by the NBA. McGrady was deemed to have suffered enough in recent times...
Vin Baker announced this week that he is out for the rest of the season, following a self imposed move to rehabilitation after it was discovered he suffered from an eating disorder.
After failing to sell for some time, the New Jersey Nets' owners have found some suitable buyers to take over the team. A group of Rappers have purchased the team, their identities not disclosed at the present time. In a press release the new owners stated that they would either "keep the team on da east side or da west side" but were not sure yet. Another undisclosed rapper was appointed head coach. When asked whether he would employ a free flowing offence which pushes the ball he replied "fo sheezy of the heezy, we'll be runnin' like a breezy". When asked to elaborate on how he would make the Nets run, he said "I'm gonna coach with a gun instead of a clip board".
After being bombarded continuosly with questions about why he is not taking the court so far this season, Darko Milicic replied to reporters, "No speak English".
Over the years Allen Iverson has been considered a selfish player, but statistics reveal that this is simply not true this current season. As well as dishing out 6.1 assists per game, Iverson is giving the ball up (to the other team) 4.2 times per game! Selfish? I think not. He is very willing to get rid of the ball, be it a shot, a turnover, or a pass.
The Orlando Magic have the worst home attendence record in the NBA so far this season with an average of 13, 914 fans per game. The undeniable stench of losing is ever present in their stadium. Other terrible smells include those left by Grant Hill, Shawn Kemp, and it won't be long before fans will be able to smell Rod Strickland. Of course the Magic are the 9th most popular road team of 29 teams. When the Magic are in town, apart from wanting to see the guaranteed home team victory, fans pour in to see the tragic (Magic) train wreck, simply because they can't look away!
The Reality TV program called "Faking It", which involves a person being trained in a certain profession for a short period of time, and then undertaking tasks within that field to fool the people around them will soon air an episode which features a Basketball player. His name is Greg Ostertag, and he will be trying to fool the Utah Jazz into believing that he is a professional Basketball player.
The LA Lakers are set to name a new Head Coach. Phil Jackson is a great motivator, but he is too team oriented, and the organisation feels that Shaquille O'Neal needs to be not only the go to guy, but the only go to guy. That is why they are about to announce that Leo Kap will be taking over the head coaching position from next week. Kap will employ an offence called 1-2-Shaq-dunk. The offence is not quite as simple as the triangle. It usually involves pass 1 - the inbounds pass, pass 2 - to a wing player, which leads to a pass to Shaq in the post, and then a dunk.
This move by the Lakers also is believed to be a salary cap move, because Kobe Bryant, Karl Malone and Gary Payton are no longer needed in the new offence and hence won't be re-signed.
Michael Jordan is rumoured to want to make a return with the Bulls this year, so that he can finish his career where it all started. The signing of the contract however has stalled because Juanita Jordan, has said that she will file for divorce again if Michael attempts another comeback. There is however one scenario where Juanita will allow Michael to return. The Bulls must trade for Doug Christie, who will shaperone Michael and teach him the ways of the faithful husband. Christie or the Kings could not be reached for comment, apparently they were busy asking Doug's wife if he can come to Chicago.
It appears Vince Carter is finally rid of the nagging injuries which have plagued him for the past couple of years. The Raptor's managment is so confident and happy with Carter's recent play and toughness, they have removed the human sized court side bubble in confidence that Vince will stay on the court this season.
Poor Leo Kap (Bballer22)...just becuz he made Shaq score 122 points in live, doesnt mean you guys should pick on him!!
wut great laughs...
