Welcome Back To The Garden of Oden

[Lamrock]

With all the major changes in Blazerland, as well as some association-related epiphanies, I have decided to reboot the Garden of Oden. The recapping style will be different, and the biggest change will be that I am running a 29 game season (though final records will be recorded in pro-rata form). I'll be re-posting a few key articles from the original thread, but soon, I'll get this started. Hype?

Game: NBA 2K11
Platform: Xbox 360
Team: Portland Trailblazers
Played Quarter Length: 12 minutes
Sim Quarter Length: 12 minutes
Season Length: 29 games
Playoff Length: 7-7-7-7
Rosters: Rashidi's accurate as of November 23, 2010 (with some alterations and rosters updating as deals happen).
Sliders: These
Allow CPU Trades: On (particularly bad ones vetoed)
Draft Prospects: Rowe32's with 12 NLSC'ers added

[Lamrock]

ARCHIVES

Articles:

10/24/2010 - Here we go again...
10/28/2010 - Maybe we should have kept Foye after all...
10/30/2010 - The most shocking news in the history of news.
11/14/2010 - All the bad news in one place.

Game Recaps

11/3/2010 - The first of the Toronto Craptors' 29 losses.
11/5/2010 - Time to blow it up and tank the season...

[Lamrock]

ROSTERS

-----Starters-----
G - Andre Miller | 6'2", 200 lbs | Utah | Born: March 19, 1976
G - Brandon Roy | 6'6", 211 lbs | Washington | Born: July 23, 1984 (C)
F - Nicolas Batum | 6'8", 200 lbs | France | Born: December 14, 1988
F - LaMarcus Aldridge | 6'11", 240 lbs | Texas | Born: July 19, 1985 (C)
C - Marcus Camby | 6'11", 235 lbs | Massachusetts | Born: March 22, 1974

-----Reserves-----
G/F - Wesley Matthews | 6'5", 220 lbs | Marquette | Born: October 14, 1986
G - Rudy Fernandez | 6'6", 185 lbs | Spain | Born: April 4, 1985
C - Joel Przybilla | 7'1", 245 lbs | Minnesota | Born: October 10, 1979
F - Dante Cunningham | 6'8", 235 lbs | Villanova | Born: April 22, 1987
G - Armon Johnson | 6'3", 195 lbs | Nevada | Born: February 23, 1989 (R)
G - Patrick Mills | 6'0", 185 lbs | St. Mary's | Born: August 11, 1988
C/F - Sean Marks | 6'10", 250 lbs | California | Born: August 23, 1975

-----Injury Reserves-----
F - Luke Babbitt | 6'9", 225 lbs | Nevada | Born: June 20, 1989 (R)
C - Greg Oden | 7'0", 285 lbs | Ohio State | Born: January 22, 1988 ([+])
G - Elliot Williams | 6'5", 180 lbs | Memphis | Born: June 20, 1989 (R) ([+])

[Lamrock]

NLSC Draftees??

Ported from my previous story, there will be NLSC draftees here. If you were signed up to have a rookie in 'Saur Losers 2, you are here. The classes are nearly full, but there is one spot in the 2012 draft class for any interested. If so, here is the form:

Code: Select all

[b]Name (first and last):[/b]
[b]Age (19-42...):[/b]
[b]Position(s):[/b]
[b]School:[/b]
[b]Height:[/b]
[b]Weight:[/b]
[b]Jersey #:[/b]
[b]Body Type:[/b]
[b]Skin Tone:[/b]
[b]5 Strengths:[/b]
[b]5 Weaknesses:[/b]
[b]Playing Style:[/b]
[b]NBA Comparison:[/b]
[b]Physical Appearance (use a headshot if necessary):[/b]
[b]Misc. Details (Backstory, sig. shot, etc):[/b]

NLSC Draft Class of 2011

Will "Sit" Sit
Andrew "The X" Watson
Leo "Valor" Lai
Julian "dare" Martin
Martti "Martti." Must
Ray "Cartar" Lliach
Albano "Thierry." Spagnoletti
Shad "shadowgrin" O'Greene
Axel "Axel13" Gomez
Justine "Justine." Crewhead.
Chris "hova-" Hov
Kenny "badreligionau" Young

NLSC Draft Class of 2012

Massimo "MassimoV" Jennings
Zee "z02" Otwo
Andrew "Chaimer_23" Walker
Don "De8" Elliot
Alejandro "Alejandrov011" Viano
George "George7" Koukoulis
Willie "Houndy" Lewis
Janis "newc" Kalnins
Jesrie "Eirsej" Calimbas
Mark "Mark." Moore
Manfred "puttincomputers" Nissley
Oskar "Oskar" Tikka

[Lamrock]

Diary of Liam Washburn

October 24, 2010 - Holy fucking shit! I can't believe it! My genius plan actually worked! In the short span of two months, I have gone from Rose Garden janitor to the assistant general manager of the Portland Trailblazers!

It wasn't easy. When job candidate Billy Knight showed up for the interview, I was very lucky that Rich Cho hadn't looked up his picture before hand. That Knight's clothes (kind of) fit, and that the sedative was strong enough for him was another blessing.

My extensive knowledge of the CBA and advanced stats (Cho loved it when I brought up Wes Matthew's defensive win shares) impressed him as well. The Abe Lincoln beard I sported made me look far older than my 17 year old age. At the end of the interview, Cho offered his hand and said, "congratulation Mr. Knight, you're hired". I replied "actually, it's Liam Washburn", taking his hand.

Intending to be a Journalism major in college, I opted to create a new Blazers blog. My inside knowledge should provide my blog with a niche not filled by your Blazersedges and your Bust A Buckets.

What's the Happy Haps, Rip City?

October 26, 2010 - Hello. My name is, lets say... Sabonis. Welcome to my humble blog. This may seem like just another generic Blazers blog with a .tk address (working on it!), but its not! Concrete details backing that statement up to come. I did get my hands on the opening night roster though!

-----Starters-----
G - Andre Miller | 6'2", 200 lbs | Utah | Born: March 19, 1976
G - Brandon Roy | 6'6", 211 lbs | Washington | Born: July 23, 1984 (C)
F - Nicolas Batum | 6'8", 200 lbs | France | Born: December 14, 1988
F - LaMarcus Aldridge | 6'11", 240 lbs | Texas | Born: July 19, 1985 (C)
C - Marcus Camby | 6'11", 235 lbs | Massachusetts | Born: March 22, 1974

-----Reserves-----
G/F - Wesley Matthews | 6'5", 220 lbs | Marquette | Born: October 14, 1986
G - Rudy Fernandez | 6'6", 185 lbs | Spain | Born: April 4, 1985
C - Joel Przybilla | 7'1", 245 lbs | Minnesota | Born: October 10, 1979
F - Dante Cunningham | 6'8", 235 lbs | Villanova | Born: April 22, 1987
G - Armon Johnson | 6'3", 195 lbs | Nevada | Born: February 23, 1989 (R)
G - Patrick Mills | 6'0", 185 lbs | St. Mary's | Born: August 11, 1988
C/F - Sean Marks | 6'10", 250 lbs | California | Born: August 23, 1975


-----Injury Reserves-----
F - Luke Babbitt | 6'9", 225 lbs | Nevada | Born: June 20, 1989 (R)
C - Greg Oden | 7'0", 285 lbs | Ohio State | Born: January 22, 1988 ([+])
G - Elliot Williams | 6'5", 180 lbs | Memphis | Born: June 20, 1989 (R) ([+])

Our season opens tonight against the Amar'e-less Phoenix Suns. Basically, we better not fucking lose this game. That would be quite turrible. Just in case we do, I'll leave y'all with this:


Peace and chicken grease.

[Lamrock]

Diary of Liam Washburn

October 28, 2010 - Sombre day in the office today. Brandon Roy's knees are irreparably fucked. He has no menisci in either knee and has bone-on-bone arthritis. We sure know how to pick 'em!

As far as I know, nobody outside of the organization knows about these MRI results... yet. Playing Star minutes has caught up to him. Nate is going to be playing him only 30 minutes per game from now on, and will run less iso plays (yes!), but for some reason Paul Allen does not want this to be leaked. Like people won't notice a hobbled Roy suddenly playing less minutes and being less of a focal point on offense?

In need of some cash (my parents get my money until I'm 18, so I must live on a paltry allowance), I redirected people to my blog with this earth-shattering news:

Blazers doctor: "Roy has bone-on-bone knee arthritis"
Translation: Roy has no meniscus left!

October 28, 2010 - I knew it was too good to be true. Joel Przybilla almost back. LaMarcus Aldridge and Nicolas Batum looking like potential all-stars in pre-season... Oden saying he might come back in a couple months. God™ forbid this team is actually successful. Plus, my car didn't fucking start today!

Anyway, back on topic, Brandon's knee is totally fucked. His meniscus is completely gone, and he now has bone-on-bone knee arthritis. While he's played every game this season, his level of play has gradually fallen, and this is why. Roy has had his knee drained twice this week, and Nate has finally opted to limit his minutes and run less isolation plays.

The Blazer brass has been hush-hush about this, but it is indeed the case. Good thing we have him signed for 5 years and $82 million! EDIT: Roy has confirmed it via twitter:

Brandon Roy
@ROYgbiv_7

@Oden_Sphere55 You think that hurts? Try playing 40 MPG without a meniscus in either knee. RT: Trainer Jay Jensen was tired of draining my knee after my every walk to the bathroom, so now I gotta have a hose in my knee at all times...

[Lamrock]

Greg Oden To Undergo Microfracture Surgery, Out For Season



October 30, 2010 - No words.

[Valor]

huh, sorry if i don't get it but why the new thread?

[Lamrock]

I opted for the new thread because re-starting the season a month in kinda ruins the continuity. Rest assured, this is the final Garden of Oden thread.

[Valor]

I opted for the new thread because re-starting the season a month in kinda ruins the continuity. Rest assured, this is the final Garden of Oden thread.

Alright it's cool, sucks that you lose Oden and have a crippled Roy now though. Rebuilding mode?

[Houndy]

29 games? I might try it Good luck though

[Fresh8]

Did you really need a new thread?

[Lamrock]

Valor, We'll see how it goes. Crippled Roy is still 80 overall, and I'm going to start the season with Pryz Bizz, so I should make the playoffs. Playing all the games, I'll be able to create the team's identity as I go along.

Houndy, Yeah, you should give it a shot. I really enjoyed my Clippers association (until the game ruined it). With The X's pro-rata idea, it makes it acceptable for realism purposes.

Sit, Yes!

[|)e8*]

Nice to see this rebooted

[kibaxx7]

I'm up for the reboot

[shadowgrin]

I'm up for the reboot

Tell us about it.

[kibaxx7]

Lol, I've done reboots but never with same teams in a row.

[Martti.]

Thierry •, then it's not a reboot.

Good luck, Lamrock. Don't understand the new topic thing though.

[kibaxx7]

Thierry •, then it's not a reboot.

Yeah I know, I meant associations / dynasties / master league reboots. Doesn't matter, it's still awful

[Mandich]

Hahaha man i love your sense of humor , just can't stop laughing on the Oden pic with the cell-phone, I assume it's photoshop ?

[kibaxx7]

No photoshop at all. (of course, NSFW).

[Axel The Great]

Good to see you'll keep going with this. With the patch coming out tomorrow, hopefully Association mode will be much more enjoyable.

[Lamrock]

Offseason ballet lessons have really paid dividends for LMA...

Blazers Open Season With Blowout Win In Toronto
LaMarcus Aldridge led the way with 31 points and 13 boards.

November 3, 2010 - BLAZERS WIN! BLAZERS WIN! Thanks to a huge night by LaMarcus Aldridge, and the Craptors being well, the Craptors, we have opened our season with a 27 point win - on the road no less!

The game was a laugher from the start. Toronto looked like a D-League team as we opened the game on an 11-0 run. Some hot perimeter shooting from senor Jose Calderon and Italian Andrea Bargnani helped keep the Craps in it, but we still held on to a 6 point lead after one period. We continued our offensive dominance into the second quarter, but hot shooting kept the game from getting too out of hand. A late 7-2 run by us made it 56-45 going into halftime. Aldridge nearly had his averages from last season at the half, with 18 points and 7 boards,

A three by Leandro Barbosa put the Raptors within single digits to start the second half. However, that would prove to be the last time they would be that close, as the Blazers proceeded to go on an 18-4 run which would put the game out of reach. Garbage time commenced, which saw the Blazers empty their bench. The Patty Mills-Sean Marks tandem dazzled, combining for 8 points, 3 boards and 2 assists in 27 combined minutes. Bafflingly enough, Jay Triano played his starters nearly the entire game, and even more bafflingly, our bench players outscored the Raptors' starters 24-21 in the fourth! We won the game 106-79.

LaMarcus Aldridge was the obvious star of the game, going off for 31 points and 13 boards. Nicolas Batum also had a good game, with 19 points, 4 boards and 4 assists, along with a couple rim-rattling dunks. Brandon Roy didn't fill the stat sheet, nor did he look like his 2008-09 superstar self, but he was still good for 15 points on 8 shots in just 23 minutes of play.

Andrea Bargnani had 23 and 9 boards after his hot start, while Jose Calderon had 18 and 8 assists, but it was not enough, as the rest of the team (shockingly) didn't show up. Former Blazers guard Jerryd Bayless was especially turrible. With the win, we improve to 1-0 (3-0 pro-rata!). Two days from now, our Blazers will travel to New Jersey, to face former Blazer forward Travis Outlaw, and the New Jersey Nets.


LaMarcus Aldridge only takes inside against Toronto | Reggie Evans was so shocked, he didn't think to grab his gonads.


Bayless, about to miss and/or turn it over | Roy quietly had a very solid game.


BATUM SHAKA LAKA!!! $%&#*$%$%$%#@!!! | Lowering the free chalupa point threshold to 70 helped keep the meat in the seats.

24 32 26 24 106 (1-0)
18 27 13 21 79 (0-1)

PORTLAND
LaMarcus Aldridge: 31 points, 13 rebounds, 3 assists, 13-20 FG (Mo Lucas Player of the Game)
Nicolas Batum: 19 points, 4 rebounds, 4 assists
Brandon Roy: 15 points, 5-8 FG, 23 minutes

TORONTO
Andrea Bargnani: 23 points, 9 rebounds
Jose Calderon: 18 points, 8 assists, 3-5 3pt
Jerryd Bayless: 2 points, 4 assists, 3 turnovers, 0-6 FG (C'Mon Son Shitass of the Game)

POR 98 TOR 68 3:00 4th
CAN WE HOLD ON?

POR 101 TOR 68 2:45 4th
Toronto timeout

POR 104 TOR 68 2:23 4th
Barbosa (somehow) misses open layup.
Fernandez 3

POR 104 TOR 70 2:00
Bargnani dunk
Raptors hit 70 points, crowd gets chalupas
Raptors' full court press forced Portland timeout

POR 104 TOR 73 1:45 4th
Mills turnover
Calderon 3

POR 106 TOR 73
Mills layup
Toronto timeout

POR 106 TOR 75 1:28 4th
Weems layup
Triano face-palms, realizing the 9 was actually a smudged 7, and that the team is down 31, not 1

[buzzy]

Chalupas!! Good win.

You keep outdoing yourself with those banners.

[Houndy]

Those banners rock..

Love Garbage Time Diaries, and guess what? The patch came out