For those who have moved far as hell....

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For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Doobie on Sun Aug 21, 2016 8:10 am

Since I rarely post anymore, let me give you guys a quick rundown as to what is going on.

I no longer live in the NYC area, I met a lovely woman and decided to move with her and her son down to Austin, TX. This is my first time really leaving home and it really has been stressful here for the last 5 months.

For those of you who have dealt with moves like this (didn't INDY move to Scotland or something?), how do you handle the adjustment and how do you deal with being homesick? Have you had trouble making friends?

I find myself doing a lot of things, but most of it is either with my girlfriend or alone. The NBA season is around the corner and for the first time I am getting NBA League pass to watch the Knicks, so that will occupy a lot of my time starting October.

How often do you go back home to visit friends and family?

It's funny to think when I started posting here I was 14, and now I'm almost 30. Time really does fly.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Kevin on Sun Aug 21, 2016 2:49 pm

Well I did move from Canada to US to study medicine and live in the same house with my girlfriend. It's easier for me to make friends because I'm still in school so I always meet people everyday. I only go back to Montreal every few months and on holidays to catch up with them. First few weeks were hell for me because I missed everyone back home like my family and my friends but my girlfriend was always by my side so it went away pretty quick.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby el badman on Mon Aug 22, 2016 3:35 am

I moved from France to El Paso TX about 12 years ago, and while I kinda knew what I was getting into (having been an exchange student there for a year before that move), it certainly was an adjustment. Making connections early on certainly helps a lot, although you wanna let it happen naturally without pushing anything, and so does staying on top of your usual habits and hobbies if you have any, so it's not a complete disconnect from what you knew. But you still wanna be curious and open to brand new things of course. For the rest, relying on your better half to ease the transition is really what seals the deal I would say.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Axel on Thu Aug 25, 2016 3:43 am

Doobie wrote:Since I rarely post anymore, let me give you guys a quick rundown as to what is going on.

I no longer live in the NYC area, I met a lovely woman and decided to move with her and her son down to Austin, TX. This is my first time really leaving home and it really has been stressful here for the last 5 months.

For those of you who have dealt with moves like this (didn't INDY move to Scotland or something?), how do you handle the adjustment and how do you deal with being homesick? Have you had trouble making friends?

I find myself doing a lot of things, but most of it is either with my girlfriend or alone. The NBA season is around the corner and for the first time I am getting NBA League pass to watch the Knicks, so that will occupy a lot of my time starting October.

How often do you go back home to visit friends and family?

It's funny to think when I started posting here I was 14, and now I'm almost 30. Time really does fly.



I moved from Rural NC to the Triangle (Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill) 10 years ago leaving behind all of my family for college. Now that I'm 5 years removed from college I'm still living here, but I still have difficulty fitting in and making friends. When I left initially, I couldn't have been anymore excited to leave behind the socially conservative culture in Appalachia for a liberal, "open-minded" place. It has been many years of self-realization, but I'm now finding that I don't quite fit in as neatly as I'd hoped, and often long to be back home. The only reason I stay here is because the economy is very strong, but I still make the 5-6 hour drive (no airports) back home at least 4 times a year. My parents and my partner and I take turns going there/coming here.

Austin receives heavy praise as being a great place to live, but of course your reality may vary (same thing applies to the Triangle). Have you gotten into the music scene, or the "counter culture" Austin is known for? I'd bet that's going to be the best way to meet people if you're not affiliated with UT.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby [Q] on Thu Aug 25, 2016 4:23 am

I haven't moved anywhere far but I've had to start over and make new friends quite a few times because the ones I had went real friends.

Making new friends is so much harder after college. I'd say become friends with your woman's friends or make friends with cool people at work. I started working out with my coworker two years ago and I managed to each my fitness goal plus he got me into Brazilian jiu-jitsu this year too. I'd say pick up old or new hobbies or activities to keep busy and not think about stuff.

Also, it helps to not like your family. I see my aunt & grandma like twice a year and they live an hour away. My mom lives like 15 mins away and I only see her once a month if that
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Sauru on Thu Aug 25, 2016 7:30 am

i moved from boston to atlanta by myself. just packed up my car with whatever would fit and sold the rest and drove on down. was fairly lonely at first. spent my days working (got a job my second day down here) and balling at night. after awhile i got to know all the other regulars and branched out from there.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Kevin on Fri Aug 26, 2016 6:12 pm

[Q] wrote:Also, it helps to not like your family.

This. :lol: If it was up to me, I'd probably just visit them once or twice every year but family ties are way too strong (for them) that I get berated to visit them.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby NovU on Tue Aug 30, 2016 5:30 pm

Having many friends is an overrated thing like Lakers, Kevin, formx, and Melo. You only need 2 or 3 good ones that will last. Quality over quantity as they say. When you're young, you don't realize this because you always have 10 or 20 buddies to party with. But your time is finite. Only thing really matters to you are a few important ones and family. Make sure you learn to appreciate them while they're there. Many take relationship for granted and end up losing people.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby mp3 on Thu Sep 01, 2016 4:13 am

I think NovU has a point (kind of)

When I was in my 20's it mattered to me to have lots of friends, be in the know and included but now in my mid 30's I have a handful of quality friends that I see from time to time and iam good with that, I mean I speak to friends most days online and also in forums like this talking about the things I want to talk about (basketball).

My advice is if you love spending time with your new family then enjoy it, if you feel like you need more then you have basketball as an ice breaker and the rest will take care of itself.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby ThePointForward on Tue Sep 06, 2016 12:43 am

Not to mention Facebook degraded the word "friend" and many people feel the need for quantity due to it.
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby Lamrock on Tue Sep 06, 2016 8:38 am

I moved away from Seattle a couple weeks ago and now I find myself drinking beer in a Whole Foods using their WiFi. (I never was a fan of this place before I realized that you could buy 6-packs of beer, and drink them in the store. Way cheaper than any bar - that's for sure! And the rotisserie chicken punch cards!) It's been a tough adjustment, but hopefully once I find a job and school starts up again those 90 miles won't feel so long. ;)
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Re: For those who have moved far as hell....

Postby The X on Mon Oct 10, 2016 7:48 pm

A tad late I know but I'll throw in my 2 cents worth. I think at 30 or thereabouts it's going to be very hard to make really close friendships as they're normally made in school or uni/college years.

At your age (I've got about 5 years on you) most people are busy with their careers & family life & if not, then absorbed in their mobile devices (as I am now on train home from work).

All this being said you can still make friendships, they just might not be long term ones. Best bets will be through work & if you play hoops try to play in Austin socially.

Best of luck with move & new life & hope you prove me wrong.
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